The tango is a wonderful dance but you need a partner. The ego dance is not so wonderful but again you need a partner.
Imagine someone tells you that you are mistaken or wrong. First step. You reply energetically ‘I am not wrong. You are’. Step two. Steps three and four can be more energetic. Nobody ends up a winner and it can be entertaining for bystanders especially in a restaurant. If you don’t like doing this dance then don’t take the first step or the second step.
First step ‘You are wrong’.
Instead of joining in the dance, try ‘ How am I wrong?’ or ‘Let’s agree to disagree’. Careful that your ego doesn’t colour your tone.
You can’t do the ego tango with only one ego. Don’t obey yours. You may be able to prove that you are right but you need to prove someone wrong. See if you can cope with someone thinking you are wrong when you know you aren’t. See if you can let them keep their opinion and not react.
Try waltzing where you are more in sync. ‘I would like to understand where you think I am mistaken or wrong’. Your partner steps forward and you step back.
