Insight vs outsight

We all know the likelihood of change occurring when we give someone negative feedback which they interpret as criticism. ‘Can I give you some feedback’ is a question few people like to hear. I call this outsight. I tell you what I see and hear in the hope you will change. Insight is when the other person realises the impact of their behaviour on others and finds the motivation within themselves to make changes. Telling is outsight. Asking helps the other to get insight. Questions help the other person to look at their behaviour and leaves it up to them to make changes. Questions about the consequences of their behaviour, help them see their behaviour through the eyes of others. A brave question to ask others is “Is there anything about my behaviour that you would like me to change?”